An Article for Article's Sake


One2Swing Monthly is more like it right?

For those of you who don't know, Sheri and I have been quite busy since the end of July. A partial list includes:

* practicing
* competing
* moving
* fixing
* work
* more work
* and more work

To the point where I've actually averaged about 4 hours of sleep for about three months (August, Sept, October .. yup three months). This stretch culminating in our traveling to France to compete at the World Lindy Hop Championships (we got 7th and 9th in the Impro and Showcase respectively!).

And now we are finally home, back to a normal (normal for us) life. Even making it out to the cinema.

And updating our website.

And showing Sheri some of these updates last night.

To which she saw the front page still showing the One2Swing Biography of Ella Fitzgerald and she thusly responded:

Sheri: "Oh you freaker .. you gotta update that!"

And in fact I do have about eight or nine article drafts awaiting completion but I figured well what the heck, why not just write something...the little voice in my head at least says that .. (or is it Sheri's voice?)

So here I am writing merrily away ... writing about what? I don't know really ..

*pauses*

Well, I suppose to make this at least somewhat interesting, here are the first five interesting thoughts which come to my mind. For the benefit of all of you I filtered out the uninteresting and/or naughty ones

First Random Thought

If I were a rich man, would I really biddy biddy bum all day?

What does that even mean? Hmmm.... consulting Merriam-Websters online dictionary.

biddy: noun: a young chicken
bum: verb: obtain by begging

** note I chose the verb definition of bum since biddy only gave me a noun definition and to have a complete phrase I needed one verb and one noun.

So Tevye is basically saying if he were rich he'd go around all day bumming chickens off of people ...

I think ?



Second Random Thought

No sleight intended on "Fiddler On The Roof"... a favorite of mine, especially with the music. In fact, you know how you sing while driving? (come on everyone does right?). A few songs I often sing because I have a bit of a deep voice:

"If I Were A Rich Man"
(Tevye from "Fiddler On The Roof")

"C'est Moi"
(Sir Lancelot from "Camelot") (a personal favorite of mine)

"I Have Often Walked Down This Street Before"
(Freddy Einsford Hill from "My Fair Lady")

"Oklahoma"
(Curly from "Oklahoma")

and last but not least, "Funky Cold Medina" by Tone Loc

So if you see me driving down the road gesticulating wildly, I'm probably singing showtunes.

(It's when I'm doing the cabbage patch that I'm probably singing "Funky Cold Medina").

Third Random Thought

The name "Steve" is a great name for jokes. No sleight to actual people named "Steve" .. I know a few, they're cool. But you know it's just the sound of certain words.. the comedic quotient is higher for some than others.

See here, we'll try it out:

A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says "Hey.. we have a drink named after you!" To which the grasshopper says: "What? You have a drink named Steve?"



*ha ha* ooh boy that's a good one.

Let's try another:

A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says "Hey..we have a drink named after you!" To which the grasshopper says: "What? You have a drink named Tony?"



Yeah ..not as funny. If you don't agree, say both jokes aloud a few times. In fact tell the "Steve" version to five people and then some other name to another five people and you'll see the difference.

Fourth Random Thought

"All the King's horses and All the King's men, couldn't put Humpty back together again".

A popular line from Humpty Dumpty, but have you ever really analyzed it? Well, don't worry, I've done it already. When I first started thinking about it, yeah baby I got confused. Why even mention that the horses failed? As if that's some surprise? Come on .. their feet (hooves) are kind of clumsy, and they're not super intelligent (relatively). The smart ones can count up to four by pounding their foot on the ground ... imagine a human being able to only do that and you'll see that expecting a horse to put an egg back together ..well, that's no surprise that they failed.

Whereas men (and women) are more handy and talented and probably can piece together an egg, and if they can't then it's more of a surprise, so it's worthy of mention as if to say "oh yeah, Humpty got it real bad now ... like all the King's men could'nt even do it yo-"

Which brings me to my revelation ... And there we see it. ... It's all about GLUE!!! In the old days glue was made from horses (is it still?). So the statement:

"All the King's Horses and all the King's men"

really means:

"All the King's Horses had to sacrifice their hooves to make a big vat of glue .. and all that glue and all the King's Men wasn't enough to put Humpty together, leaving all the horses dead (or hobbly at best) and all the King's men at a disadvantage to any attackers which thusly left the King's kindgom ripe for a hostile takeover, which smacks of conspiracy and you just got to know that it was one of the King's sworn enemys that caused Humpty to have this 'falling off of a wall' accident thing thereby crippling the King's army".

But I'm guessing the author didn't have all that room and trimmed it down to the well known verse, hoping that one day someone intelligent and bright would decipher the implications.

Yeah mm-hmm. Robert Langdon, move over.


Fifth Random Thought

"STEVE!"



Yup ... still funny ...

With that, I bid you adieu!